[He can hear the strain now, feel it squeeze through the phone speaker like it's gotten stuck there and is trying to pry itself free. Part of him wonders if there's something he could say to have the guy calm down or something. But alas, he's just taking random shots in the dark- he's never really had to talk to people experiencing panic attacks.]
Travis was quite the little shite, I'll tell you that much. I didn't approve of him being suckered into the vicious con-turned-business, so I sought him out to finish him should he be too weak to fight himself out of that bloody mess, but he prevailed in the end. Lucky man, he was.
[That's the only question he answers though, not interested at all in delving into his childhood nor about telling how he'd managed to be bested by a stupid machine.]
I hope you don't take this the wrong way, Wade, but... why the sudden interest?
[And there it was. The question he'd been afraid Henry would ask. If only he'd had more self-control, Henry wouldn't have gotten suspicious. It was all in his head, anyway. The tightness in his chest, the pounding of his heart-- all of it would have just gone away if he'd just gotten a better grip on himself. He didn't need Henry for this. He didn't need anyone.]
Heh. Maybe I'm just curious to know what kinda life you come from. Maybe I wanna know if it's anything like mine, since we're in the same profession and all. Maybe I really like hearin' that Irish brogue of yours. Maybe I'm... just curious about what Travis's twin brother thinks of him.
[That last statement seems to twist something within him, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as a sudden ache blooms in his sinuses. He can't account for why his eyes are suddenly watering.]
Just... keep talking, okay? Please. Doesn't matter what you talk about. I just [(feel like I'm becoming unstitched)]... I can't [(seem to pull myself together)]...
[Henry has to dredge up all his willpower not to sigh into the receiver. He can tell he's already struck a bit of a nerve here, or at least said something that obviously isn't helping. Part of him tells him he should feel terrible and sorry, that he should try and make this better, but getting himself into that mindset is harder than he expected. There were never many instances in his life where he had to truly feel bad for anyone before.
There's a bit of a pause where Henry takes a moment to collect his thoughts, and with a breath, he starts to talk again much like someone would when beginning a story.]
I'm pretty sure I was born in California, but Travis and I were separated at birth. For some reason or another, I was sent off to live with a couple in Ireland where I had a relatively normal childhood. My parents ran a strict household, running a legitimate business on top of my father being an assassin as well. My father shaped most of my life growing up, applying an authoritarian style of parenting which quickly- to nobody's surprise -turned me into a bit of a problem child.
[He keeps his voice even, making sure not to speak too quickly or too slow.]
I dropped from public school at fifteen, due to my interest in joining my father's profession. Maintaining whatever little bit of a social life I had and training for the job was incredibly difficult, so I was homeschooled for the remainder of my high-school years. Went abroad, met a girl, and well... that's really when everything started.
[Talking this much about himself feels a bit unnerving, like he's revealing a particularly sensitive nerve up to someone, daring them to take a swing at it. He knows Wade won't, but it's still a feeling he can't shake.]
[Wade knows from past experiences that focusing on himself during a panic attack will only make things worse. He needs diversion; a steady sound or image or touch to latch onto, and Henry's voice is unique and soothing enough for Wade to divert his attention to that. He stops trying to control his breathing, merely closes his eyes and attempts to imagine what Henry's childhood must have been like, what the man must have looked like at 15; at 10. For some reason, in Wade's head Henry's younger self is very reminiscent of Harry Potter, even though he knows that probably wasn't the case in reality. For one thing, Harry was British, not Irish. For another, he wasn't an assassin. (The books probably would have been better if he were, though.)]
Heh... keepin' it in the family, huh? Your dad sounds like a real livewire.
[He still speaks with difficulty, trying to talk his way around the tightness in his chest.]
I... I guess your career started, then? After you met your... wife, I'm guessing?
[A career in assassination starting as a result of meeting a woman. Why the hell does that sound familiar?]
[Thinking back to his childhood is always an interesting trip down memory lane, especially when it came to his father. He was... quite a character.]
You could say that. He was a relatively charismatic person with a demanding presence, but I suppose at the very core we're all a bit odd.
[Thinking about Sylvia is The Trip for him, and while he's starting to finally move on, he still finds himself thinking of her quite often. Usually something reminds him of her, or if he talks to a mongrel girl with blonde hair, he immediately (and subconsciously) compares them to her. It's a bad habit he's trying to shake.]
It's when it really started taking off, yes. I was still quite green when we met, and while she had been apprehensive at first, she accepted my lifestyle quite well. She's extremely fearless and ambitious, moreso than a lot of people I've ever met, and I suppose that's what drew me to her. She's made of fire and silk, soft to the touch but let it linger too long, it burns through you under the guise of pleasure. She's... quite the woman. Her ambition gave me the experience and thrill I sought as a teenager, while she benefited from the power and monetary gains. It was a true win-win situation; she was my soulmate, and I lost her.
[There's an almost distant quality to his voice as he slips into his own memory. He even pauses for a moment, but then immediately snaps himself out of it.]
Anyway. It's when I found out about Travis that I think we started to drift, not that I knew at the time.
Wade can relate. It's kind of pathetic how much he can relate. He isn't sure that he would consider Vanessa a soulmate-- especially toward the end, when her power of duplicating people's identities left her with none of her own-- but she and Wade had definitely had an understanding of each other beyond that of most couples. Losing her had been surprisingly painful-- it was hard for him to say whether or not he was still in love with her, towards the end, but her death had left a particularly large scar on his heart.]
...I'm sorry. Might not... y'know-- seem like much comin' from someone like me, but... I got an idea of what that feels like. Like your whole world just got smaller.
[He can't imagine Henry in love. He's never even seen the guy laugh. But he recognizes the distant, almost detached tone in his voice-- the tone of someone desperately trying to close himself off. The tone of someone trying to separate his emotions from his memories, the way someone would stop a gangrenous infection by severing a limb. It's a tactic Wade knows well.]
[He knows his situation isn't exactly one in a million. There were so many men and women out there who probably fell in love too quick, got married while caught up in that whirlwind of excitement, then someone just threw a wrench into that lifestyle– which in this case was Jeane, then fell out of it. Some crashed into the earth, leaving scars and bruises inflicted so terribly that they never healed, and some tumbled little by little, counting each and every scar that healed on top of the other as time passed.
It's easy to say: "Yeah, it's not much," in the long run, but he can hear the heaviness in Wade's voice. Replying like that would be too harsh; heartless. This is a man that's like him in some ways (thought very different in others), trying to empathize or at least commiserate with him here... he imagines it's just as tough if not tougher for him in this moment. He has to actively remind himself.]
Nothing to be sorry for, really. It's easier to have this sort of personal conversation with someone who can relate on some level. I might not have her, but I think myself among the very few lucky blokes who can claim to have found that sort of moment in their life. Sure, ten years isn't forever, but perhaps that's what makes this measly little life I so desperately cling to be that much more precious.
[He chuckles suddenly, moving the receiver a little away from his mouth. Then clears his throat, amusement in his tone.] All bleedin' cliches aside, I did find my brother in the end because of her. Bastard slept with my wife, but I can't exactly hold that against him. He's both everything I did and did not expect, which I... I suppose is only to be expected. To think, I have a brother... it's surreal.
[Lucky indeed. Wade doesn't know what it's like to share a ten-year stint with someone-- his writers life just doesn't seem to have that plan in mind for him. Wade's love life was always like a powderkeg: powerful, flashy, and quick to sputter out. His job probably doesn't allow for that sort of domesticity anyway (no kids for sure-- he's learned to accept that over the long expanse of his life) but was a long-term relationship too much to ask for? Was his life really so chaotic that it couldn't allow that?
He banishes the thought of Clem and Jessica. It's too dangerous to think of his little Amazons right now. Instead, he focuses on the next topic of conversation.]
Wait-- Travis... with your wife?
[If he sounds skeptical, that's probably because he is. He likes to think he knows Travis quite a bit, and this seems largely out of character for him.]
I'm not saying that you're lyin', but... honestly I'm surprised. That doesn't seem like something Travis would do.
[If Henry can do it, Wade can do it! It the writers let him.
He lets out a strained chuckle at the disbelief in Wade's voice. Perhaps Wade would find that unlikely, and so had Henry, but hearing it from Travis's lips from the first time they dueled had been something of a shock.]
I doubt he actually did when he'd said he did. Think he was just after tryin' to get under my skin, having just met and myself trying to off him and all. After the missus and I split, though... I wouldn't be surprised.
[A sort of humorous tone creeps into his voice, underneath the slightly bitterness of it all.] Still slept with my wife.
Anyway. Some time passes, three years to be exact, and something brought that bloody fool back. Something happened. Revenge is a nasty game, but at least his overarching intentions were much more noble, so I can't really complain. I suppose, in the end, he was God-sent as well.
[It's a strange phrase, even coming from someone like Henry. Wade isn't sure he'd call a long-lost twin brother who'd slept with his wife and disappeared for three years God-sent, but maybe there's more to Henry and Travis's relationship that hasn't been revealed. Wade's surprised to find that he's almost jealous, for whatever reason-- despite the fact that they'd been estranged for decades, this is a man who shares the same genetics with Travis; shared a womb with him. As an only child, Wade would never know what that felt like.]
[There is a reason for that, too, of course. He's still a little iffy about approaching the subject about the things Travis has done for him, despite being 'collateral damage' to him at the time. He'd been in Wade's position before, before finding out about Travis, that is. When growing up as an only child in Ireland, he'd learned early on that he'd been adopted. His parents weren't so callous as to tell him outright from the get go, but they weren't the type to kid themselves either. Henry was a perceptive child, and he knew how to dig around for information.
So after learning that he was quite alone (or so he thought), he knew that sort of emptiness.]
Oh, he grew on me, I suppose. Nobody would've been able to tell with how we interacted, but I think that's just how brothers are I suppose, estranged or not. That shite about twins having a sort of sense for the other is a bit strange, though. Sometimes, I think I'm the only one of the two that pays attention to it, acts on it, but I suppose in his own way he does as well.
[A pause.]
Could've left me to die, that one, but he didn't. So, I suppose there is a bit of fondness for the idiot.
[He and Cable had had a similar relationship, despite not technically being related. Did it count if they shared DNA? (Not like that, you pervert.) It's hard to say. By that logic, though, that would mean that he and Wolverine were related as well. He and Cable had a similar vitriolic thing going on, though-- Wade would try to kill him, Cable would retaliate by psychically exploding a chunk of Wade's cranium-- but it somehow never got to the point where they wanted nothing to do with each other. Unless you counted their "divorce" that one time.
Cable had once said, "For two people who constantly say they don't need each other, we sure keep finding stupid reasons to try and stay together." Wade wonders if the same could be applied to Henry and Travis.]
I mean, not that I'd know anything about siblings or anything like that. Closest thing to that I ever had was when pieces of my personality became autonomous and started livin' their own separate lives.
[Classic Deadpool was fucking weird, okay?]
Anyway, from one contract killer to another, not leaving you to die is pretty much a demonstration of brotherly love right there.
[A few seconds of silence before he speaks again, as if he's hesitant to voice his next thoughts aloud.]
I told you that I, uh... got to know your brother pretty well. He's a surprisingly deep guy, y'know? Underneath all that weeaboo douchebaggery, I mean. We... we got pretty close before he left.
[That feeling is rising in his chest again. He takes a few deep breaths to will it away.]
[Henry is gonna try not to think too hard about the autonomous personalities of Deadpool manifesting themselves into physical bodies and running around, the idea of it both purely ridiculous and hilarious all at once. It does break up a bit of the moody vibe, however, and finds himself chuckling under his breath.]
Yeah, looks like we're after working on it a touch...
[The fact that Travis didn't simply leave him or refuse to take Sylvia's request to keep him at his place spoke more than words ever could. It's not something most would go out of their way to do for him, and that means a lot to him. Travis being a pretty deep guy underneath it all isn't all too surprising for him, so he simply makes a humming sound in agreement. He's heard all the speeches, the things he'd said in passing, and he knows the guy isn't a complete fool despite making himself appear like one.
The bit about them being close does grab some of his attention, though. He knew they were friends, but when Wade hesitates slightly, he wonders if their relationship was on a higher level than just two men who watched each other's backs and shared drinks or something like that.]
He... left, hm? He does have a tendency to do that, doesn't he? Do something worthy with your life, then just fuck off for a bit... it's familiar. I suppose him leaving was for the best.
[There's something pisses him off about the way Henry says it so nonchalantly, as if this was something Travis did regularly. What angers him the most, he supposes, is the fact that he can't find any fault in Henry's assessment of him. Wasn't that what Travis had done in Haven? Hadn't he changed Wade's life, over and over again, only to leave at the most inopportune time, over and over again?
He could argue that in Haven, it probably wasn't Travis's fault; that some sort of outside force-- probably Yao-- kept pulling him out of Haven and setting him back again, with no memory of his absence or even any knowledge that time had passed. He could argue that the last time, it had been permanent, with Travis being placed in the horrifyingly vague limbo known as "storage". But there's really no sense in telling it to Henry. Wade's not even completely sure if that's what had happened to the people who just disappeared day after day. Besides, it probably wasn't this Henry's Travis anyway. Instead, Wade blurts out the first thing that comes to mind:]
I died saving him. In Haven, I mean. That's how we... y'know. Met.
[Henry can't accurately sense the source of the anger that Wade holds back behind his voice, only able to regard the quiet way he replies as a sort of recalling an unhappy memory thing.
The sudden admittance of information has Henry blinking on the other end of the line. So, this is the extent of their relationship, is it? Close friends, almost like brothers- perhaps more like brothers than he and Travis ever could be. To have someone actually die for you- now that's a real kicker. In some ways, he's almost happy to hear this, that someone would treat his brother with this much care and respect after all the crap he'd went through ever since going through with the UAA. Then Haven. Then...something else. He'd never gone back to the library to read through those books again to know what happened in the end...if there ever was an end.]
I imagine that must've left quite the impression on him. My baby brother always did have a soft spot for dramatics, and wears his bleedin' heart on his sleeve for the whole world to take a stab at.
[He pauses, finding amusement in all of this despite the somber atmosphere. He'd almost said, "Almost makes me a little jealous," but he's not sure how someone would interpret that. The temptation to talk further about his feelings about his twin brother is there, but he hesitates to go any further. He doesn't want to think about how he can't imagine dying for Travis, though if he'd been there in the flesh, all rational thought might've gone out the window. It's all too uncomfortable to think about, and a bit sad, and he can't seem to shake that feeling. Not to mention he'd be sharing these feelings with a man he'd only started getting to know, and that's already strange enough as it is.]
Psh. I'll say it left an impression on him. Took us forever to become friends after that. Guess the guy felt he had some sorta Wookiee life debt to me after that happened, an' he wasn't happy about it. Then again, he... kinda had to find out about the whole "death isn't permanent thing" from somebody else, so that probably added to his bad mood when we met each other again.
[His voice takes on an almost faraway tone, as if he's reliving the memories while recounting them to Henry.]
It's kinda funny, really. Seems like every time we tried to patch things up after that, things just got worse and worse. I still can't really figure out why we still kept tryin' to break past all the bullshit and actually try to bond with each other, but I'm kinda glad we did. He, uh... he ended up bein' one of my best friends. Before he left, anyway.
[To be honest, he doesn't know why he's telling Henry all of this. It's not as though the man could understand the trials he and Travis and anyone else had gone through. Like describing colors to a blind person, or starvation to someone who had never unwillingly gone without a meal in his life. Some things you just couldn't share with anyone except the ones who'd been there with you.
Wade grows quiet, lifting his mask to wipe away a sudden patch of dampness on his cheeks. He's really gotta stop wearing his mask indoors like this-- it's too hot, and his eyes obviously aren't getting enough oxygen. It probably accounts for the tightness in his chest, as well-- he has to fight to keep his breaths quiet and even.]
Hey... listen. I'm, uh... I think I'm gonna take off now. Maybe have myself a shower and a nap or somethin'. Thanks, though. For... tellin' me all that stuff, I mean. Feel like I'm closer to you now, y'know?
[A joking tone; a flirtation he doesn't entirely feel. At the very least, he's good at that-- good at shoving his emotions down so that others can't see. The masks he wears aren't always tangible, after all.]
[Wade is correct in thinking that he wouldn't understand. Henry simply couldn't understand the depth of their relationship, and he has nothing in his own life to compare that feeling to aside from the bit that Travis had done for him. In all honesty? It's only but a blip compared to what Wade and Travis shared. He's not sure if that makes him feel inadequate for being a lesser presence to his own twin brother than a random person like Wade. Perhaps a bit. He'd never admit to being jealous, especially not this early on in their interactions.
Hearing him talk about it does seem to cement one fact, though: That Travis is strong; worthy of whatever title the "adoring" public gave him back in Santa Destroy because of his ability to form such strong emotional bonds with others. Something that Henry couldn't actually bring himself to do, no matter how beneficial it all turned out to be. He had his own way of doing things, and hearing someone's story isn't enough for him to up and change his ways (not that he thought Wade was trying to do such a thing, it was just simply a thought he had).
As their conversation seemed to come to a close, he lets out an affirmative sound. As much as he didn't enjoy talking about himself, it didn't necessarily hurt him in anyway, least of all with Wade. Judging by the tone though (joking or not, he doesn't sense any ease of tension right now) he feels his attempt to quell the man's upsetting mood was a bit...sub par.]
I... suppose you are. [There's a touch of fondness in his own tone. Not many people get to hear him prattle on about his early life.] I realize I'm probably not the most relaxing individual to converse with, but I hope you feel better. Do get some rest.
Y-yeah. [It's almost a rule that when you're speaking with someone while suffering the effects of emotional vulnerability, said person will undoubtedly say one thing, one seemingly innocuous trigger phrase-- "are you okay" or "you look sad" or even "have a wonderful day"-- that will send you over the edge. Wade knows that Henry's probably only being polite here; saying things that people say without thinking, but in Wade's weakened state it's enough to undo his joker's repose. Like holding someone's nose shut as he's suffering from a collapsed lung.
Wade presses his lips tightly together and swallows hard, waiting a few seconds to ensure that his voice does not break. He pushes one hand against his eyes in attempt to banish whatever dampness might be summoned there by Henry's careless words.]
Hey, listen. Thanks, pal. Thanks for hearin' me out. You're, uh... [oh god no his voice is wavering shit shit shit--] you're not such a bad guy, y'know that? I-I'll see you around. Maybe. Gotta go.
[He presses the "end call" button before Henry has a chance to reply and make things worse. His hand is shaking as he grips his palm reader, Henry's picture on the screen suddenly blurring as the wetness behind his eyes returns with a vengeance. His breath hitches once, twice; so many times that eventually he ceases trying to keep it down.
Not for the first time, Wade finds himself very glad that he lives alone.]
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winterfish
no subject
Date: 9/7/15 01:31 am (UTC)Isn't that always the way-- havin' a fight end just as you're about to get into it?
[It's interesting that Henry mentions suffocating to death, because that's how Wade feels right now. His throat closing up, lungs fighting for air...
His next questions, when they come, are spoken with quite a bit of difficulty.]
How... how did you end up nearly s... suffocatin' to death? What was your childhood like? What was Travis like back then?
no subject
Date: 9/7/15 01:41 am (UTC)[He can hear the strain now, feel it squeeze through the phone speaker like it's gotten stuck there and is trying to pry itself free. Part of him wonders if there's something he could say to have the guy calm down or something. But alas, he's just taking random shots in the dark- he's never really had to talk to people experiencing panic attacks.]
Travis was quite the little shite, I'll tell you that much. I didn't approve of him being suckered into the vicious con-turned-business, so I sought him out to finish him should he be too weak to fight himself out of that bloody mess, but he prevailed in the end. Lucky man, he was.
[That's the only question he answers though, not interested at all in delving into his childhood nor about telling how he'd managed to be bested by a stupid machine.]
I hope you don't take this the wrong way, Wade, but... why the sudden interest?
no subject
Date: 9/7/15 01:51 am (UTC)Heh. Maybe I'm just curious to know what kinda life you come from. Maybe I wanna know if it's anything like mine, since we're in the same profession and all. Maybe I really like hearin' that Irish brogue of yours. Maybe I'm... just curious about what Travis's twin brother thinks of him.
[That last statement seems to twist something within him, and he pinches the bridge of his nose as a sudden ache blooms in his sinuses. He can't account for why his eyes are suddenly watering.]
Just... keep talking, okay? Please. Doesn't matter what you talk about. I just [(feel like I'm becoming unstitched)]... I can't [(seem to pull myself together)]...
no subject
Date: 9/7/15 02:51 am (UTC)There's a bit of a pause where Henry takes a moment to collect his thoughts, and with a breath, he starts to talk again much like someone would when beginning a story.]
I'm pretty sure I was born in California, but Travis and I were separated at birth. For some reason or another, I was sent off to live with a couple in Ireland where I had a relatively normal childhood. My parents ran a strict household, running a legitimate business on top of my father being an assassin as well. My father shaped most of my life growing up, applying an authoritarian style of parenting which quickly- to nobody's surprise -turned me into a bit of a problem child.
[He keeps his voice even, making sure not to speak too quickly or too slow.]
I dropped from public school at fifteen, due to my interest in joining my father's profession. Maintaining whatever little bit of a social life I had and training for the job was incredibly difficult, so I was homeschooled for the remainder of my high-school years. Went abroad, met a girl, and well... that's really when everything started.
[Talking this much about himself feels a bit unnerving, like he's revealing a particularly sensitive nerve up to someone, daring them to take a swing at it. He knows Wade won't, but it's still a feeling he can't shake.]
no subject
Date: 9/11/15 10:48 am (UTC)Heh... keepin' it in the family, huh? Your dad sounds like a real livewire.
[He still speaks with difficulty, trying to talk his way around the tightness in his chest.]
I... I guess your career started, then? After you met your... wife, I'm guessing?
[A career in assassination starting as a result of meeting a woman. Why the hell does that sound familiar?]
no subject
Date: 9/11/15 08:18 pm (UTC)[Thinking back to his childhood is always an interesting trip down memory lane, especially when it came to his father. He was... quite a character.]
You could say that. He was a relatively charismatic person with a demanding presence, but I suppose at the very core we're all a bit odd.
[Thinking about Sylvia is The Trip for him, and while he's starting to finally move on, he still finds himself thinking of her quite often. Usually something reminds him of her, or if he talks to a mongrel girl with blonde hair, he immediately (and subconsciously) compares them to her. It's a bad habit he's trying to shake.]
It's when it really started taking off, yes. I was still quite green when we met, and while she had been apprehensive at first, she accepted my lifestyle quite well. She's extremely fearless and ambitious, moreso than a lot of people I've ever met, and I suppose that's what drew me to her. She's made of fire and silk, soft to the touch but let it linger too long, it burns through you under the guise of pleasure. She's... quite the woman. Her ambition gave me the experience and thrill I sought as a teenager, while she benefited from the power and monetary gains. It was a true win-win situation; she was my soulmate, and I lost her.
[There's an almost distant quality to his voice as he slips into his own memory. He even pauses for a moment, but then immediately snaps himself out of it.]
Anyway. It's when I found out about Travis that I think we started to drift, not that I knew at the time.
no subject
Date: 9/20/15 10:45 pm (UTC)Wade can relate. It's kind of pathetic how much he can relate. He isn't sure that he would consider Vanessa a soulmate-- especially toward the end, when her power of duplicating people's identities left her with none of her own-- but she and Wade had definitely had an understanding of each other beyond that of most couples. Losing her had been surprisingly painful-- it was hard for him to say whether or not he was still in love with her, towards the end, but her death had left a particularly large scar on his heart.]
...I'm sorry. Might not... y'know-- seem like much comin' from someone like me, but... I got an idea of what that feels like. Like your whole world just got smaller.
[He can't imagine Henry in love. He's never even seen the guy laugh. But he recognizes the distant, almost detached tone in his voice-- the tone of someone desperately trying to close himself off. The tone of someone trying to separate his emotions from his memories, the way someone would stop a gangrenous infection by severing a limb. It's a tactic Wade knows well.]
no subject
Date: 9/21/15 07:58 am (UTC)It's easy to say: "Yeah, it's not much," in the long run, but he can hear the heaviness in Wade's voice. Replying like that would be too harsh; heartless. This is a man that's like him in some ways (thought very different in others), trying to empathize or at least commiserate with him here... he imagines it's just as tough if not tougher for him in this moment. He has to actively remind himself.]
Nothing to be sorry for, really. It's easier to have this sort of personal conversation with someone who can relate on some level. I might not have her, but I think myself among the very few lucky blokes who can claim to have found that sort of moment in their life. Sure, ten years isn't forever, but perhaps that's what makes this measly little life I so desperately cling to be that much more precious.
[He chuckles suddenly, moving the receiver a little away from his mouth. Then clears his throat, amusement in his tone.] All bleedin' cliches aside, I did find my brother in the end because of her. Bastard slept with my wife, but I can't exactly hold that against him. He's both everything I did and did not expect, which I... I suppose is only to be expected. To think, I have a brother... it's surreal.
no subject
Date: 9/21/15 04:51 pm (UTC)his writerslife just doesn't seem to have that plan in mind for him. Wade's love life was always like a powderkeg: powerful, flashy, and quick to sputter out. His job probably doesn't allow for that sort of domesticity anyway (no kids for sure-- he's learned to accept that over the long expanse of his life) but was a long-term relationship too much to ask for? Was his life really so chaotic that it couldn't allow that?He banishes the thought of Clem and Jessica. It's too dangerous to think of his little Amazons right now. Instead, he focuses on the next topic of conversation.]
Wait-- Travis... with your wife?
[If he sounds skeptical, that's probably because he is. He likes to think he knows Travis quite a bit, and this seems largely out of character for him.]
I'm not saying that you're lyin', but... honestly I'm surprised. That doesn't seem like something Travis would do.
no subject
Date: 9/22/15 04:50 pm (UTC)It the writers let him.He lets out a strained chuckle at the disbelief in Wade's voice. Perhaps Wade would find that unlikely, and so had Henry, but hearing it from Travis's lips from the first time they dueled had been something of a shock.]
I doubt he actually did when he'd said he did. Think he was just after tryin' to get under my skin, having just met and myself trying to off him and all. After the missus and I split, though... I wouldn't be surprised.
[A sort of humorous tone creeps into his voice, underneath the slightly bitterness of it all.] Still slept with my wife.
Anyway. Some time passes, three years to be exact, and something brought that bloody fool back. Something happened. Revenge is a nasty game, but at least his overarching intentions were much more noble, so I can't really complain. I suppose, in the end, he was God-sent as well.
no subject
Date: 9/29/15 12:30 am (UTC)[It's a strange phrase, even coming from someone like Henry. Wade isn't sure he'd call a long-lost twin brother who'd slept with his wife and disappeared for three years God-sent, but maybe there's more to Henry and Travis's relationship that hasn't been revealed. Wade's surprised to find that he's almost jealous, for whatever reason-- despite the fact that they'd been estranged for decades, this is a man who shares the same genetics with Travis; shared a womb with him. As an only child, Wade would never know what that felt like.]
...You're kinda fond of him, aren'cha?
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Date: 9/29/15 06:47 pm (UTC)So after learning that he was quite alone (or so he thought), he knew that sort of emptiness.]
Oh, he grew on me, I suppose. Nobody would've been able to tell with how we interacted, but I think that's just how brothers are I suppose, estranged or not. That shite about twins having a sort of sense for the other is a bit strange, though. Sometimes, I think I'm the only one of the two that pays attention to it, acts on it, but I suppose in his own way he does as well.
[A pause.]
Could've left me to die, that one, but he didn't. So, I suppose there is a bit of fondness for the idiot.
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Date: 10/1/15 01:21 pm (UTC)[He and Cable had had a similar relationship, despite not technically being related. Did it count if they shared DNA? (Not like that, you pervert.) It's hard to say. By that logic, though, that would mean that he and Wolverine were related as well. He and Cable had a similar vitriolic thing going on, though-- Wade would try to kill him, Cable would retaliate by psychically exploding a chunk of Wade's cranium-- but it somehow never got to the point where they wanted nothing to do with each other. Unless you counted their "divorce" that one time.
Cable had once said, "For two people who constantly say they don't need each other, we sure keep finding stupid reasons to try and stay together." Wade wonders if the same could be applied to Henry and Travis.]
I mean, not that I'd know anything about siblings or anything like that. Closest thing to that I ever had was when pieces of my personality became autonomous and started livin' their own separate lives.
[Classic Deadpool was fucking weird, okay?]
Anyway, from one contract killer to another, not leaving you to die is pretty much a demonstration of brotherly love right there.
[A few seconds of silence before he speaks again, as if he's hesitant to voice his next thoughts aloud.]
I told you that I, uh... got to know your brother pretty well. He's a surprisingly deep guy, y'know? Underneath all that weeaboo douchebaggery, I mean. We... we got pretty close before he left.
[That feeling is rising in his chest again. He takes a few deep breaths to will it away.]
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Date: 10/3/15 10:32 pm (UTC)Yeah, looks like we're after working on it a touch...
[The fact that Travis didn't simply leave him or refuse to take Sylvia's request to keep him at his place spoke more than words ever could. It's not something most would go out of their way to do for him, and that means a lot to him. Travis being a pretty deep guy underneath it all isn't all too surprising for him, so he simply makes a humming sound in agreement. He's heard all the speeches, the things he'd said in passing, and he knows the guy isn't a complete fool despite making himself appear like one.
The bit about them being close does grab some of his attention, though. He knew they were friends, but when Wade hesitates slightly, he wonders if their relationship was on a higher level than just two men who watched each other's backs and shared drinks or something like that.]
He... left, hm? He does have a tendency to do that, doesn't he? Do something worthy with your life, then just fuck off for a bit... it's familiar. I suppose him leaving was for the best.
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Date: 10/19/15 12:41 am (UTC)[There's something pisses him off about the way Henry says it so nonchalantly, as if this was something Travis did regularly. What angers him the most, he supposes, is the fact that he can't find any fault in Henry's assessment of him. Wasn't that what Travis had done in Haven? Hadn't he changed Wade's life, over and over again, only to leave at the most inopportune time, over and over again?
He could argue that in Haven, it probably wasn't Travis's fault; that some sort of outside force-- probably Yao-- kept pulling him out of Haven and setting him back again, with no memory of his absence or even any knowledge that time had passed. He could argue that the last time, it had been permanent, with Travis being placed in the horrifyingly vague limbo known as "storage". But there's really no sense in telling it to Henry. Wade's not even completely sure if that's what had happened to the people who just disappeared day after day. Besides, it probably wasn't this Henry's Travis anyway. Instead, Wade blurts out the first thing that comes to mind:]
I died saving him. In Haven, I mean. That's how we... y'know. Met.
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Date: 10/20/15 07:55 am (UTC)The sudden admittance of information has Henry blinking on the other end of the line. So, this is the extent of their relationship, is it? Close friends, almost like brothers- perhaps more like brothers than he and Travis ever could be. To have someone actually die for you- now that's a real kicker. In some ways, he's almost happy to hear this, that someone would treat his brother with this much care and respect after all the crap he'd went through ever since going through with the UAA. Then Haven. Then...something else. He'd never gone back to the library to read through those books again to know what happened in the end...if there ever was an end.]
I imagine that must've left quite the impression on him. My baby brother always did have a soft spot for dramatics, and wears his bleedin' heart on his sleeve for the whole world to take a stab at.
[He pauses, finding amusement in all of this despite the somber atmosphere. He'd almost said, "Almost makes me a little jealous," but he's not sure how someone would interpret that. The temptation to talk further about his feelings about his twin brother is there, but he hesitates to go any further. He doesn't want to think about how he can't imagine dying for Travis, though if he'd been there in the flesh, all rational thought might've gone out the window. It's all too uncomfortable to think about, and a bit sad, and he can't seem to shake that feeling. Not to mention he'd be sharing these feelings with a man he'd only started getting to know, and that's already strange enough as it is.]
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Date: 10/25/15 12:22 am (UTC)[His voice takes on an almost faraway tone, as if he's reliving the memories while recounting them to Henry.]
It's kinda funny, really. Seems like every time we tried to patch things up after that, things just got worse and worse. I still can't really figure out why we still kept tryin' to break past all the bullshit and actually try to bond with each other, but I'm kinda glad we did. He, uh... he ended up bein' one of my best friends. Before he left, anyway.
[To be honest, he doesn't know why he's telling Henry all of this. It's not as though the man could understand the trials he and Travis and anyone else had gone through. Like describing colors to a blind person, or starvation to someone who had never unwillingly gone without a meal in his life. Some things you just couldn't share with anyone except the ones who'd been there with you.
Wade grows quiet, lifting his mask to wipe away a sudden patch of dampness on his cheeks. He's really gotta stop wearing his mask indoors like this-- it's too hot, and his eyes obviously aren't getting enough oxygen. It probably accounts for the tightness in his chest, as well-- he has to fight to keep his breaths quiet and even.]
Hey... listen. I'm, uh... I think I'm gonna take off now. Maybe have myself a shower and a nap or somethin'. Thanks, though. For... tellin' me all that stuff, I mean. Feel like I'm closer to you now, y'know?
[A joking tone; a flirtation he doesn't entirely feel. At the very least, he's good at that-- good at shoving his emotions down so that others can't see. The masks he wears aren't always tangible, after all.]
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Date: 10/25/15 10:42 pm (UTC)Hearing him talk about it does seem to cement one fact, though: That Travis is strong; worthy of whatever title the "adoring" public gave him back in Santa Destroy because of his ability to form such strong emotional bonds with others. Something that Henry couldn't actually bring himself to do, no matter how beneficial it all turned out to be. He had his own way of doing things, and hearing someone's story isn't enough for him to up and change his ways (not that he thought Wade was trying to do such a thing, it was just simply a thought he had).
As their conversation seemed to come to a close, he lets out an affirmative sound. As much as he didn't enjoy talking about himself, it didn't necessarily hurt him in anyway, least of all with Wade. Judging by the tone though (joking or not, he doesn't sense any ease of tension right now) he feels his attempt to quell the man's upsetting mood was a bit...sub par.]
I... suppose you are. [There's a touch of fondness in his own tone. Not many people get to hear him prattle on about his early life.] I realize I'm probably not the most relaxing individual to converse with, but I hope you feel better. Do get some rest.
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Date: 10/25/15 11:29 pm (UTC)Wade presses his lips tightly together and swallows hard, waiting a few seconds to ensure that his voice does not break. He pushes one hand against his eyes in attempt to banish whatever dampness might be summoned there by Henry's careless words.]
Hey, listen. Thanks, pal. Thanks for hearin' me out. You're, uh... [oh god no his voice is wavering shit shit shit--] you're not such a bad guy, y'know that? I-I'll see you around. Maybe. Gotta go.
[He presses the "end call" button before Henry has a chance to reply and make things worse. His hand is shaking as he grips his palm reader, Henry's picture on the screen suddenly blurring as the wetness behind his eyes returns with a vengeance. His breath hitches once, twice; so many times that eventually he ceases trying to keep it down.
Not for the first time, Wade finds himself very glad that he lives alone.]